Wow! What a disasterous first week!! Right off the starting block, my motivation was incredibly low. I had forgotten about the cabin fever, winter blues. Looking back at last year's journal, I see that my numbers had taken a dive in Jan/Feb, and that in March I struggled and fought myself back on track successfully. So now I have to do better this year. First step is to look at the facts.

I did not meet my weekly goals on pushups, situps, techniques, self propelled travel or horse stance minutes. I came close to my goals for kicks, meditation journal entries and Chi kung forms. I met my goals for Tai chi sword form, knitting meditation, 10 day cleanse, maintaining goal weight, and abstinence from caffeine. There is no reason why a can't get on track this next week. So that is my goal. In the meantime, here is my January 8 journal meditation entry.

The knitting is not going so badly because I love to knit. The mindful part is not going so well but I've decided not to worry about it - stay relaxed and allow the progress to happen. So thus far, I've never made it through a whole row without noticing that my thoughts are once again in full throttle and far away from the present moment. Two areas of slight progress though. First, I have made it from an average of 3 stitches, up to 8 stitches with mindful focus intact. This has allowed me to become more aware and appreciative of the color, feel and rythm of the work. Second, I've started to trace how I got from 'focus' to a mind in full throttle. It starts only with one stray spark of a thought sneaking into my empty mind. Within stitches, that spark fires through the pathways of my mind, igniting a string of thoughts which relate to the intial spark. Its like a string, thread, or yarm - highly combustible, and fast burning.